5:30 AM Dad knocks on my door and says “It’s 5:30” (which you already knew, but I didn’t, at the time) I mutter something incoherent and grab for the toothbrush in the bag by the bed.

6:15 AM Having swung by my brother’s house to pick him up, we stop at a covered gas station to rearrange the stuff in the bed of the truck without the “help” of the chilling, driving rain.

7:03 AM We complete the first three-sentence verbal exchange of the day, between the three of us. Subject matter? The I-40 bypass around Greensboro, and the relative merits of each route.

8:49 AM I decide to give up in the quest to keep from nodding off in the passenger seat, but realize that comfortable seating and three full-grown males in a Dodge Ram are mutually exclusive concepts.

11:39 AM I come to the crushing realization that Nags Head, NC (population 7,000 in a heavy day, plus some tourists) has far better cell phone reception than Asheville, NC (population 50,000 on the worst day this quarter-century, plus some tourists). I bitterly take it out on AT$T via a passive aggressive Tweet at 11:40.

11:51 AM A Mexican Pizza and two soft tacos are involved. No further details are available for the public, until next-of-kin and physicians can be notified.

12:53 PM After meeting up with my uncle and cousin, we drop our luggage off at the Breakwater Inn. I make the mistake of asking if there is a “fitness center” here. I’ll be walking on the beach to stay in shape.

2:33 PM I get up the guts (pun intended) to hurl the fish bait attached to my line as hard as I can into the surf. It immediately becomes apparent how poor of a decision that is, when the line snaps, sending the 4 ounce weight, rigging, and bait sailing well beyond the breakers.

2:40(ish) PM Some unsuspecting fish gets a fancy lip ring that is unfortunately no longer attached to my reel.

5:00 PM I inadvertently hum an Aaron Neville song out loud, and feel the need to toss my man card into the ocean.

6:20 PM Having packed up the slightly fewer than 1 fish we caught and dropped the gear off at the Breakwater, we find ourselves in “Pop’s Raw Bar” (where bikers and 4x4s are welcomed, according to the sign) enjoying some amazing seafood and second-hand smoke.

7:30 PM I sit down to the laptop back at the Breakwater to find that, to my surprise, “The Fisherman’s Quarters” next door has Wi-Fi. This post is the immediate result.

Here’s hoping we catch some fish tomorrow. Or that I get this Aaron Neville song out of my head. Either would be considered success.

I was going to write a post just now (in fact, had it all set up to click “post”) about a former Dook basketball player that was not very… well… nice.

I guess it’s OK to dislike the team, but I should probably avoid the public, personal shots.  After all, he’s a guy that needs Jesus, just like me.  And you can’t believe everything you hear on the internet.  And it was all in good fun, but that’s tough to pull off, believably, on a blog.

But in case you all want to draw your own hilarious conclusions, read this article.

Another Friday Amusement.  Enjoy a dose of Rhett&Link

Trying to get back on the Friday Amusements train.  This is hilarious.  Check out Tripp and Tyler and their antics.  For those unfamiliar with the speaker, that’s Andy Stanley from Northpoint church in Alpharetta, GA.

Did I get the printer to work? Yes.  Did the screen present a wonderful Engrish phrase to let me know?  Yes.  Way to go NetGear, you might want in the future to run the final product past an English-speaker for a little proofread action.  Just a thought.

I wanted to post something funny this morning.  Here’s a funny joke I heard recently.

North Carolina has a football team.

Buhdump-Ching.

Tip your waitress.

Mitch Hedberg.  I thought of him today as I tweeted “How do you feel about frilly toothpicks?” but I can’t find a G rated version of that particular joke online.

I thought we’d go on a fun trip with all the new readers, and share something with you that, unless you’ve been around for quite some time, you don’t know about us.  This first post will be about me (Ben) and is something you know if you’ve read my 25 things post, but I’m about to take you all the way back to 2001 and fill you in on the details.  So crank up the Kirk Franklin, because this story will make you want to stomp. (I’m really sorry for that reference.  I won’t let it happen again)

I was in Central Asia (can’t tell you the country, but I can tell you it used to be a Soviet Socialist Republic…) with Campus Crusade, and a friend named Chris and I had been invited to a local student’s house.  We were excited to go, and took a “taxi” trip (anything with 4 wheels and an extra seat is a taxi in that town) that dropped us off right around the corner from our destination. The local student met us, shook hands (as is the custom), and motioned for us to follow him.

I wish I had taken a picture, because using words to describe what happened next simply doesn’t do it justice.

We rounded the corner to find a late-middle-aged man in what I hesitate to call an above ground pool, for fear that you won’t envision a giant tin can filled with water.  Also of note is the fact that our as-yet-unintroduced new friend was wearing what appeared to be tightie-whities.  I can’t confirm that, because there’s a one glance maximum on those types of things.

Our fully-clothed student friend looked at me and struggled to come up with three English letters, all the while pointing at the man in the tin can, who I had just noticed was holding a half empty bottle of vodka… “K, um, G, ah, B” he said, “yes, KGB”

Let’s pause and recount.  A student in a former Soviet country had just introduced two American college students (who were in the country to share their faith without government permission) to his friend the nearly-naked, definitely-intoxicated former KGB agent.

You’re thinking it couldn’t get any more surreal than that, right? Surely this story has hit it’s weirdest point?

Nope.  Let’s fast-forward past the pleasantries of meeting one another.

Vladimir (the name I’ve just given the naked KGB agent) put down the vodka, looked up, and asked in his thick Russian accent, “So, what is difference between Muslim and Christian?” followed by, “I never read Bible.  What is special about Bible?”

Yup, that’s the most conflicted I’ve ever felt.  Do I answer this guy’s question and risk it being a trap, or do I feign ignorance and face the very real potential that he never meets another Christian in his lifetime?  No pressure.  I refused to make eye contact with Chris, hoping he’d take that as a cue to answer the question.

I honestly don’t remember exactly how the rest of the conversation went.  I do know that we dodged the question the first time, and tried to figure out why he wanted to know.  I also know that we left him with a Russian language Bible, and had fully explained the gospel by the time we left.

I hope Vladimir read that Bible.  And I hope Jesus took the scales off his eyes to see God for who He truly is.  And, someday in heaven, I hope to get that story from his perspective.  Because it’s easily my most memorable conversation about the gospel to date, and, most likely something you didn’t already know.

Seriously, bro, lay off the outfit.  My ears were cold.

(via daniellellanes):

The second installment of Friday Amusements.  This video makes me laugh harder every time I watch it.  If you are a friend on facebook, i may have already shown this to you.  I don’t apologize for allowing you to see it again.

They were giving out Hooters stickers at the Ballyhoo yesterday, and I thought I’d take one and clarify. Now it’s a thoroughly biblical sentiment.

Each Friday, I am going to start giving you a link to somebody who makes me laugh, or something that makes me laugh.  Here’s the first one.  Click the image above to read one of my favorite posts from a very funny guy named Bryan.

wygle:

loveallthis:

Inspired by jeannr, I flowcharted the Beatles classic, ‘Hey Jude.’